THE LAST GIRL (final)
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“If I should commit suicide, I have tried.”
If there is a god up there, as they claim, I will face him. I will ask him a lot of questions about why he created me to suffer. Why he left me from childhood to jump from pain to suffering
No one understands my ordeal. “Am I the only one on earth?”
Esther kept thinking.
She got a pen, she got a paper… She wanted to write the last note.
She kept staring at the ceiling of her room.
Life did not treat her well. She was born out of wedlock. Her mother was raped, and the father was unknown. Eunice, her mother died during labour.
Lilla, her mother’s elder sister, raised her up. She had to sell the only house their late father left just to take care of Esther.
Lilla later married a widower, a pastor. For years, she had no baby, and when she got pregnant and it was time for delivery, she died too.
Esther left with her husband.
Her husband took care of Esther, but everything crashed when he attempted to rape her.
The world turned upside down. Esther had no one.
Men were willing to help Esther, but they always demanded s*x. Some would try to rape her.
Esther hated men.
But she was fed up and ready to give up that night.
But as she stood up from the bed, she fell. She hadn’t eaten that day and had no strength.
She fell asleep in the spot.
She found herself on a field. It was a big field.There were so many people that they couldn’t be counted.
It was a field for racing; everybody was running on his or her track. Some fainted, some fell, some sat, some were tired…
Esther looked around, then looked back on her track; she saw dry skulls.
She became frightened. But she was alone; nobody paid attention to her; they were all running their race.
As she sighted the dry skulls behind her, she started shouting.
“Someone help me, someone help me.”
But nobody answered her, they were all busy on their tracks.
Then a man came to her and said, “I am your father!”
Esther became angry upon hearing the sound of a father.
“You are an incompassinate father; how could you leave me to suffer all these years?”
The man replied, “But I love you!”
“I hate you, I hate you,” Esther screamed, blocking her ears with her hands so she would not hear the man. The man kept quiet and moved away a little.
Esther started wailing…
Then something like a large lizard was approaching, taking each of its four steps one by one, like a leopard hunting after a deer.
The large lizard had a black head and a red tail; it came towards Esther as if to swallow her.
Esther started shouting.
The lizard had fire in his tail and water in his mouth.
It opened his mouth, and water gushed out like a flood and rushed towards Esther.
Suddenly, a young man came just before she could be swallowed, he hit the ground, and the ground opened up and swallowed the water.
The large lizard got angry and spit fire up,
The young man said, “The Lord rebuke you!”
Esther was grateful.
She turned to the young man and said, “Thank you, thank you.”
The man answered, “Don’t thank me; thank the One who sent me.”
“Who sent you?” Esther asked looking around.
The man bowed and pointed to the old man.
Esther became angry and said, “No, I don’t want him; he has no compassion.”
Esther was there for more time, knowing nowhere to go or what to do. Others were running their races.
Some were falling, and new people people were coming.
Esther eventually turned to the old man and asked, “So why am I here?”
The man stretched his hand, and Esther moved closer to him, bowing her head as though ashamed.
“I have been waiting for this question since you became a girl, but you have neglected me.”
I have tried all means to reach you, but you have not paid attention to me.
I am your God, and I created you.
I have always protected you since you were in the womb.”
Esther looked up at the man, but she couldn’t see his face; rather, she saw something like a vision.
She saw her mother drink poison twice.
She saw different creatures attempting to choke her in the womb as a child.
The man spoke, and this time his voice echoed.
“I have assigned my angel to you since you were born. No one could do you harm because I protected you. Yet you had no regard for me.”
Suddenly, the appearance of the man changed. His cloth became radiant like the yellow sun rising in the morning. Esther kept looking, but the appearance got so bright, like the sun at noon, that she couldn’t look again.
Then Esther looked at the skulls and heard, “You are the last girl. The baton is over to you. They that were before you failed and fell like placards.”
“I have a desire to raise a nation through you who will bring glory to my name.”
The angel that opened the ground to save Esther came closer and explained many other things about her life and the importance of her marriage to God. Esther understood that God, in His sovereignty, was driving the vehicle of her life.
She woke up crying and sobbing!
With tears, she prayed,
“Lord, I am sorry.”
I have neglected you all my life.
I have thought my life was for me.
I have carried my burden alone.
I have suffered alone. I felt no one cared.
I am sorry; show me mercy.
I don’t want to fail like those before me.
“Have mercy on me.”
Esther remained in the house for two days, crying and begging God for mercy.
On the third day, a friend came and talked to her about Jesus.
She told her, “Even though you have neglected God until now, You can be forgiven of all your sins if you believe in the sacrifice of Jesus. This is the gospel of Jesus that He died to give you forgiveness and access to God as your Father. You can stand before God like you have never sinned.”
Dear Readers,
You are passing through things you can’t fully understand…
Why carry your burden alone?
Or you are thinking, “Does God care?”
Does He hear my prayer?
You are asking, “Why me?”
It has to be you.
No one else; it’s you, and only you have that destiny. God is taking you somewhere. If you give up, you will waste all that God has been doing since you were in the womb.
Your life is not ordinary.
Your life is not ordinary.
Your life is not ordinary.
Your life is not ordinary.
Today is a fresh day to trust God afresh!
Written by ๐ ๐ Tosin Ezekiel
Well well well, thanks