๐ ๐ฌ ๐๐จ๐๐๐ฌ’๐ฆ ๐ฆ๐จ๐๐๐ฅ ๐ ๐จ๐ ๐ ๐ฌ
๐
ฟ๐
ฐ๐๐ ๐๐
ด๐
๐
ด๐
ฝ๐๐
ด๐
ด๐
ฝ
Kola and Deaconess proceeded to Kaduna in order to meet Jerry. They wanted to get there in good time, have the procedure done and possibly return the same day. They thought of the most suitable means to get there and opted for going by road; in Deaconess’ car.
They would have opted for going by flight but were wary of meeting someone that knows them at the airport. They did not want to be seen together in the public. People might put two and two together and start making conclusions. Already, Deaconess had been receiving calls from church members asking why she’d not been going to church since she returned. Some of them had even visited her at home. Before long, she won’t be able to continue hiding. Her action might raise suspicion. She had started showing. Despite wearing loose and large wears to conceal her growing midsection, there are people that are very observant and will quickly detect that she’s pregnant. The womb watchers would know that something is wrong. The news would go viral.
Kola drove the car. Throughout the journey, they behaved like strangers to each other and only spoke in monosyllables. The atmosphere was very uncomfortable. Kola concentrated on the road while deaconess sat beside him like a dummy. At most times, she was preoccupied with her thoughts. They gave her more than enough company. More than Kola would have done.
It was like the impact of what they were going to do did not fully dawn on her until they were about 2 hours to their destination. When it dawned on her, she started ruminating on the possible outcome of an abortion. Firstly, she could scale through without any detrimental aftermath, except of course, her conscience. She might also pull through but with either minor or major consequence that could crop up later.
Consequence!
She could die on the abortion table. She had heard of young ladies and women that had lost their lives while trying… That could happen to her. What would be her fate if she doesn’t make it out alive? It’s as clear as ABC. Eternal damnation.
Kola and his friend would bury her in secret. They wouldn’t have the gut to tell anyone of what had happened to her. The Kola that is sitting beside her is not the same Kola that she knew before now. The old Kola was humane, this one is ruthless. If she dies, he might hide her death from everyone. He would do everything to conceal his secret.
Deaconess asked herself of what she would have done if it was someone else that was in same condition and she was in the position of giving advice to that person.
She remembered when Mrs Jason’s daughter got pregnant. How she had counseled her not to abort the baby. She told her to put what people would say behind her. She gave an adage of a bad name lasting for just a season and a good name also lasting for just a season.
Mrs. Jayson listened to her advise. They kept the pregnancy. Her family suffered humiliation and ridicule from church members, but now, she’s happy that they kept the baby. Her daughter that got pregnant out of wedlock has become one of the pillars in the church.
When Elder Ogechukwu’s family was about breaking up because of the wife’s wayward life and deception, it was deaconess and others like her that waded into the matter and counseled the wife to own up, accept her fault and make amends. She even stood by her side on the day that the church disciplined her.
Deaconess had always been an advocate of the church disciplining erring members. She had sat in several committees were such kind of decisions were made. She was even the Chairperson of the committee that disciplined Dr. Felix when he diverted church fund for personal use and tried to manipulate the church account. At those times, it wasn’t in her wildest dream that such could happen to her.
Presently, she feels as if God is speaking to her, that those people that faced similar circumstances in the past weren’t the worst sinners. They erred at a point just as she erred. Those that accepted their fault and repented are better off. Those that refuse to acknowledge their fault openly stand condemned. There are many people that are claiming holiness in the church and living dirty lives. The culture of casting stones and stigmatization has not helped at all.
Words come easy when one is not at the receiving end of an unpleasant event. But when it is you, you and you alone that is faced with an unpleasant situation, when humiliation stares you in the face, it becomes an herculean task to make a decision. Deaconess is finding it difficult to follow the principle she had always taught others-
๐ญ๐ฌ๐จ๐น ๐ฎ๐ถ๐ซ.
๐บ๐จ๐ ๐ป๐ฏ๐ฌ ๐ป๐น๐ผ๐ป๐ฏ ๐จ๐ต๐ซ ๐ท๐ผ๐ป ๐ป๐ฏ๐ฌ ๐ซ๐ฌ๐ฝ๐ฐ๐ณ ๐ป๐ถ ๐บ๐ฏ๐จ๐ด๐ฌ.
๐ฏ๐ถ๐ต๐ถ๐ผ๐น ๐ฎ๐ถ๐ซ
Deaconess’ thoughts got her depressed. The long silence didn’t help matter. Soon enough, fear began to creep into her heart. Fear about the eventual outcome of their planned action. Fear of ending up as the loser. She would lose her dignity, respect, sympathy and love. She might even lose her life.
Deaconess cringed at the thought of losing her life and felt the presence of a sinister force in the car with them. The horror was so much that her head felt heavy and goosebumps rose on her body. Fearfully, she glanced back and thought she heard a voice laughing maliciously. Her heartbeat increased and she screamed. “Kola please stop.”
He casted a sideward glance at her and continued driving.
” I say stop.” She shouted.
” What is it?”
” Stop.”
Kola pulled to the tarmac and stopped. They were at the point of entering a small village. ” What is it?” He asked angrily.
” Have you had a second thought on what we want to go and do?” Deaconess asked with fear written all over her.
” What sort of questions is that? Haven’t we concluded?”
” Yes, we might have concluded,” Deaconess answered. ” But I’m having a bad feeling about the whole thing. God is not happy with us. If we are not the victims here, would we advise whosoever is involved to take the type of step we are about to take? We are behaving like hypocrites. We committed adultery, we’ve been lying and now, we want to add murder to our sin. I don’t think I can go through this.”
” Madam, I should have known that you are emotionally unstable. How would you allow us to come all this way and start saying those trash from your mouth?”
” Who is speaking trash? Mind the way you talk to me. Try to understand me.”
” No. I can’t understand you. If you choose to back out now, I will leave you here and take another vehicle back. I believe you will be able to drive yourself. I will also wash my hands off this whole nonsense. If you mention my name to anyone as the father of your child, I will tell the whole world of how you used your auditing job as a bait to draw me close to you and seduced me.”
” Kola!” Deaconess screamed, covering her mouth.
Just then, Jerry called and gave the direction to where they would stay for the night, when they get into Kaduna. It was at his own expense. He said that he was about to enter into the theatre for a major surgery that might take him and his team members several hours to finish. He promised to meet them at the hotel the following morning.
All the while, the phone was on speaker and Deaconess heard all that Jerry said clearly. A plan was already forming in her mind.
Kola looked at her, said something under his breath and fired the engine. They continued their journey.
They got to Kaduna and checked into the hotel. They had two single rooms. Fine for everyone. They bade each other goodnight and went into their separate rooms. Deaconess already had her plan, she would leave the hotel as soon as possible the following morning. She would brave the odd and drive herself out of here. It’s better she dies in a car accident than die on the abortion table. She’d not yet decided on when and how she would inform the pastor. She might eventually move to a place where she would deliver the baby without anyone knowing.
With her mind made up, she knocked on Kola’s door. He opened and she demanded for the car key. She said she needed something from the car.
He looked at her curiously but handed the key to her. As she turned her back to him, he smirked.
He had envisaged this would happen. She would want to back out. She would want to leave him at the hotel. He had thought right and had disconnected a major wire in the car. Nobody moves until Jerry comes to do the needful by tomorrow.
TO BE CONTINUED
ยฉBosede Fagbemi
