Narcissistic Pastor
Episode 5: The Fear of Being Free
The sun was beginning to set as Ruth stepped into the house. A strange mix of emotions swirled inside her—relief, guilt, and a hint of something she hadn’t felt in a long time: hope.
Her lunch with Sister Grace had felt like stepping into another world. A world where she wasn’t just Pastor Daniel’s wife, but a woman—her own person.
She placed her handbag on the table and sighed deeply. The silence in the house was deafening, but for once, it didn’t feel suffocating.
Then, her phone rang.
Her heart jumped. It was Daniel.
She took a deep breath before answering. “Hello, my husband.”
“How are you?” His voice was calm, but she could hear the usual authority beneath it. “Have you been praying for me?”
“Yes,” she said quickly, hoping he wouldn’t ask any further.
“I hope you haven’t been idle,” he continued. “I expect to see you spiritually stronger when I return. Stay focused.”
Ruth clenched her fist. Focused? Focused on what? On being locked away from the world?
“Yes, my husband,” she said, forcing obedience into her voice.
After the call ended, she sat down, staring at the phone in her hand.
For years, she had been taught that submission meant sacrifice. That a woman must give up everything to be a good wife.
But was this truly what God intended for marriage?
Was she wrong for wanting more?
That night, she stood before the mirror, looking at herself—not as Daniel’s wife, not as the pastor’s obedient shadow, but as Ruth.
For the first time, she allowed herself to whisper the words out loud.
“I deserve to live.”
And deep down, she knew—there was no going back.
Narcissistic pastor
Episode 6: A Step Towards Herself
The next morning, Ruth woke up feeling different. Something had shifted inside her.
For years, she had lived under Daniel’s shadow, obeying his every command, sacrificing her dreams for his ministry. But after her meeting with Sister Grace, she couldn’t unsee the truth—she had lost herself.
As she prepared breakfast, she made a bold decision. She would go out again.
She wanted to feel the sun on her skin, to hear the sound of people’s voices—not just through a window, but around her.
After cleaning up, she wore a simple but beautiful dress and stepped outside. For a moment, she hesitated, looking around as if expecting Daniel to appear out of nowhere and scold her.
But he wasn’t here.
For the first time in years, she walked freely, feeling the earth beneath her feet.
She went to the local market, something she hadn’t done in a long time. She bought fresh fruits, chatted briefly with the vendors, and even smiled genuinely for the first time in what felt like forever.
At one of the stalls, a woman selling fabrics noticed her.
“You have such a graceful presence, my sister,” the woman said. “Are you a designer? You look like someone who would do well in fashion.”
Ruth’s heart skipped a beat. A designer?
She had always loved fashion. Before she got married, she dreamed of owning a boutique, of dressing women in elegant clothes. But Daniel had crushed that dream, saying a pastor’s wife had no business in fashion.
Still, the woman’s words lingered in her heart.
That night, as she lay in bed, she whispered to herself, What if I start again?
For the first time in a long while, the thought of a future that belonged to her didn’t feel impossible.
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Next episode 7
