The Hanging Vine episode 10

The Hanging Vine

(episode 10)

Betrayal is the worst kind of heartbreak because you almost never see it coming. Ever heard of the saying that goes “it’s easier for a friend to hurt you than a total stranger”? Well apparently, that is nothing but the simple truth. How would I have known that my supposed best friend ‘Dora’ would hurt me in a way I never imagined?. Her betrayal to our friendship of over four years was something I never saw coming. Like what reasonable explanation would she give to me at that moment that will be enough to justify the fact that I caught her in my boyfriend’s house wearing his tshirt. To be honest, I was itching to hear such befitting explanation from both Dora and Oscar before the rage that was already boiling inside of me overshadows my whole body. Saying I was shocked would be an underestimation of how I was actually feeling at that moment. Someone needed to start talking before I completely lose my mind and cool.

Immediately Dora saw me standing at Oscar’s door, she was shocked beyond words can describe. I believed she wished the ground could just open and swallow her at that moment because she was faced with her greatest nightmare. One look at my supposed bestfriend’s eyes and I could see nothing but regrets and shame beaming through her eyelids.

That day was sadly going to mark the end of many ‘Ships’ in my life and that was certain. My heart was bleeding profusely with no emotional first-aid in sight. It seemed as though I was drowning in misery with no life guard to help me. My whole world was completely shattered into irreparable pieces. Just before I opened my mouth to speak, Oscar walked into the scene.

“What in heaven’s name going on here? Dora, what’s going on? Why are you in my boyfriend’s apartment and also wearing his shirt? Is this some kind of prank or joke? Is this a dream or something because it sure seems like a I’m dreaming” I shockingly said and turned towards Oscar’s direction; “what’s going on? Why is my best friend in your apartment? Can you also tell me why she’s putting on your shirt? You both should better start talking now before I completely lose my mind” I furiously said while almost out of breath.

On seeing that I was about to go gaga, Oscar broke the silence. “Babe, please I beg you, let’s go inside and talk about this. I promise there’s an explanation to this. I know what you are thinking right now but first hear me out before you judge the situation” he nervously said. On the other hand, Dora was still panicking with her head bowed downwards. She shamefully walked away from the door while Oscar was talking and stood behind him. That single sight alone was enough to take the life out of me. Seeing her stand behind the man I was madly in love with as though he belonged to her was enough to send me 6ft below the ground. I was hurt beyond words could ever describe.

When Oscar was done talking, I was able to fix the scattered puzzles in the head. Every doubt was confirmed and every confusion suddenly became clear. My greatest fear was now sadly a reality and without any verbal confirmation, I could tell that Oscar and Dora had an affair. At that moment, I needed no seer to confirm my assertions because the truth was beaming right in my very eyes. Without any reasonable doubts, my whole world was completely shattered beyond repair. What a tragedy!

“Did you sleep with her?” I bluntly asked out of nowhere. Oscar was a bit hesitant to reply and that tiny gesture of his gave me all the answers I needed. As bitter tears began to fall from my eyes, I asked again; “did you sleep with her?”. This time around, there was an indirect answer to my question. “Babe please let us just go somewhere and talk this out, I promise to give you all the answers you seek. Please babe, let’s just go somewhere if you aren’t comfortable being here” Oscar said in a shaky tone. Despite all his efforts to divert my question, I remained unshaken. “Did you sleep with her? Just answer the damn question Oscar” I repeated but still didn’t get a direct answer to my question.

It was at that point I realized that Oscar had undeniably cheated on me with my best friend and probably with more women that I didn’t know of yet. Just when I thought I had met that one man my heart beats for, the sad reality was that he wasn’t exclusively mine to keep.

As I stood at that door staring at my soon to-be ex boyfriend and bestfriend, words would fail me to truly describe how broken and betrayed I felt. These two individuals had stabbed me deeply in the heart and have left scars that would sadly take forever to heal. My time being there was over because there was no need seeking for answers or explanations to something I already knew the answer to. However, just before taking my leave, I had one last thing to say to the two people that were responsible for my pain. With tears in my eyes, I began to speak.
“Saying I’m disappointed in the both of you would be an understatement of how I truly feel right now. Like what’s the gain for hurting me this way? What have you both gained for doing what you have done to me? Do I deserve this in any way? Honestly tell me what I have done to deserve such betrayal, pain and heartbreak from the two very people that were supposed to have my back in life and wish me well. Dora what did I ever do to you? So you have had eyes for Oscar all these while but yet you pretended as though he was the worst thing to ever happened to planet earth. So all those times you made me feel bad and guilty for being with him, you actually wanted him for yourself. How can something that makes me so happy be a target of possession for you? What makes you think you can effectively build something beautiful out of another person’s tears? Where on earth did I wrong you since we became friends for over four years now? Dora you have really hurt me and this time around, there’s no savoring our friendship. I trusted and loved you as a sister but this is what I get in return. It’s ok, I wish you all the best and a beautiful life but without me in it. This is the last I would ever speak to you. I don’t carry any grudge for you but please stay the hell away from me for real this time. Stay away from me!” I soberly said before finally facing Oscar. “What have you gained from doing what you have just done with my best friend? Oscar tell me what I did wrong to warrant such betrayal from you? Not after everything we have been through and you chose to pay me by stabbing me in the back. Are you happy now? No tell me, are you happy with yourself for what you have done to us? I always had my fears and doubts about you but never in my lifetime did I see this affair with my bestfriend coming. Are you happy now seeing me broken? How fulfilled is your manhood now since it has gotten what you couldn’t just wait a little more while for me? Are you happy now that a few minutes of pleasure has ruined the beautiful love we both shared? Why couldn’t you just wait a little longer for me till I was ready to give you my body? Why did you do this to us Oscar?. This isn’t fair, why awaken my love if you knew you weren’t going to ride with me till the very end?. I hate myself for falling so deeply in love with you even when the signs of your infidelity was all over my face. How naive I was to believe that you could be a better person just for us. Well, for whatever reason you cheated, I hope it is worth it because I’m gone for good and never coming back. I wish you both the best of luck in whatever Situationship you have going on. Have a nice life” I soberly said and walked away.

Immediately I left Oscar’s door, he pursued after me while Dora entered inside to probably change into her outfit so as to take her leave too. Regardless of what both of them where up to, I cared less and just wanted to leave their presence as soon as possible before I completely break down. Since the day I was born, I had never felt such pain and ache in my heart like I felt that day. The pain was so much that I could hardly catch my breath. The tears that fell from my eyes at that moment were coated with bitterness and undiluted emotions. I was completely shattered!

After chasing me nonstop, Oscar finally caught up with me at the gate. I was furious yet in uncontrollable tears to the extent that words were very heavy to even leave my mouth. Immediately Oscar got to me, he try grabbing me from behind to stop me from leaving but not before I knocked off his hands with every single strength in me.

“Don’t you ever touch me in your life again because if you try it, I would call the cops on you. I would advice you this minute to go back to your apartment and complete your affair with my best friend. I don’t want to ever see or speak to you ever again in my life. Leave me the hell alone and please move from me sight” I angrily said while still walking out. Oscar needed not to be told that I was extremely furious and meant every single word that came out from my mouth. Despite still trying to talk me out of leaving, he had no other option than to let me go because there was no way I would stay to listen to another of his numerous lies. I was done and done for good so there was no need to give listening ears to any explanation or whatsoever. I was able to book an Uber right away and in a flash of light, I was gone.

On the ride back home, I cried so intensely to the extent that the Uber driver began to show concern. He almost parked his car to console me but I was inconsolable. The man had pity on me and tried begging me to stop crying but no way. When I finally arrived at my house, I headed for my bed and soaked my pillows with tears.

With every passing minute, my phone kept ringing nonstop till I had to switch it off. Oscar and Dora tried to reach me but all efforts proved fruitless because every means of reaching me was blocked. I believe Oscar came visiting that same day because the knocks on my door never ceased till after 7pm before the knocks finally ceased. It was apparent that he was the one behind the door that evening hence the reason I didn’t move an inch from my bed. I cried that day like I have never done before. Death felt ideal because I was honestly tired of living.

While I was going through one of the toughest moments of my entire life, Dora was equally shattered and sought for ways to reach me to at least explain herself. Unable to reach me through any means, she waited till the next day so as to see me in school but I didn’t show up. A whole week passed but still no show in school and at this point, she began to get really worried thinking I had committed suicide or done something drastic to hurt myself. Worried on what could be the case, she decided to come to my house to check up on me but couldn’t see me either. After knocking countlessly with no response from me, she got tired and left. Despite all efforts from both Oscar and Dora to reach me, it all proved abortive. It suddenly seemed as though I had just disappeared from the surface of the earth with no single trace of my way abouts.

For all those while I was being searched for by Dora and Oscar, they had no clue that I was in my apartment. I locked myself inside and had been indoors all week sobbing. My feet hadn’t left my apartment since after the incident and with the rate at which I was going, it was just a matter of time before I would literally fall sick. The truth was that I needed to be alone with my thoughts with no distractions from anyone. I was seriously lost and needed to find my way back to my feet again.

Days turned to weeks and weeks to a month and just like that, it’s been over one month since I lost the love of my life and bestfriend. I would be lying if I said it was easy for me to wake up each day but I somehow found the strength and courage to get by despite the strong will to just give up my quest for life. Despite being broken, battered and bitter, I still found a reason every day to be thankful for life and forge on.

For all those while I was going through severe heartbreak, Oscar was seriously going through it too. He had completely lost his mind and was like a walking dead man. There was no day Oscar didn’t try to see or talk to me but he never got the access he dearly desired because I blocked every nook and cranny he could have used to get to me. I knew he was sorry and dearly needed to talk things out with me but the sad truth was that I didn’t care to listen to anything him or Dora had to say to me. I just didn’t care and certainly didn’t want to hear anything from either of them.

Everyday after I resumed classes, Oscar stalked me outside the school premises just to see and talk to me but I made arrangements with a taxi driver to come inside the school campus to pick me up. We usually drove through the gate without his knowledge; that way, he always had no idea at what time I usually left the school.

On the other hand, Dora was totally invisible to me during classes. I ignored the living daylight out of her and usually pretended as though she doesn’t exist to me. Call me petty or not but the truth’s that I was done.

Months passed by and I was still holding unto a grudge against Oscar and Dora even though I tried to be in denial. For some strange reasons, I began to feel a little guilty for not rendering forgiveness to them even though they were the ones who wronged me. The confirmation to forgive them came one Sunday after church service. That day, the minister preached about forgiveness and how it affect us the more when we hold back our forgiveness to those that it is due for. Having heard that sermon, I became sober all over again and began to seek for ways to render my forgiveness to both Oscar and Dora even though it meant not accepting them back into your life. I waited for the perfect day to tend my forgiveness to them and that beautiful day came at last.

After lecture one fateful evening, I took the bold step to reach out to Dora after many failed attempts from her to reach me. After class that day, Dora was quietly seated on her seat when I walked up to her. Before she could say a word, I hushed her with the words “I forgive you”. When she heard those words from me, tears began to fall from her eyes. “Sophie please find it in your heart to forgive me, I know I truly messed up and don’t deserve anything from you but I would be the happiest person on earth knowing that you have at least forgiven me. I’m so sorry” she sadly said.
After Dora was done apologizing, she tried to hug me but I smiled faintly and told her that won’t be necessary. She tried to inquire the status of our friendship and after a brief silence on my part, I finally gave her the answer she sought for. “We honestly can’t be friends anymore. That I have forgiven you doesn’t necessarily mean that I want you back into my life as a friend. You have no idea how much you hurt me but that’s ok. The presence of forgiveness doesn’t automatically change the fact that my heart is still bleeding from the betrayal I got from you. I’m doing this for me and not for you nor Oscar. I just want peace to reign in my heart because I can’t afford to let you guys ruin the rest of my life for me. I deserve to be happy and be at peace and if forgiving you is the only way I can finally move on, then so be it. Dora, I wish you all the best and pray you find it in your heart to truly forgive yourself. Thank you for the years of friendship you gave to me, I appreciate all the moments we shared together and the memories we created. Just so you know, I will be changing back to morning class this weekend so as to prevent us from bumping into each other every day. Do take care of yourself” I said and walked away.

Forgiving Dora introduced a glimpse of peace to my life. I didn’t know for sure if the peace had come to stay and eventually help me move on from my sad life but one thing I knew for sure was that I was on the path to healing. “I have one last person to forgive” I said to myself on my way home that day. While still in the taxi, I texted Oscar and told him to come to my house. I didn’t tell him why he was coming so it kinda left the message vague. Without even second guessing, I knew he would leave everything he was doing and head straight to my house so I wasn’t in anyway doubting that he would come.

Few minutes after arriving my apartment, I heard a knock on the door. I was done taking my bath at the time and went to open the door, knowing fully well it was Oscar knocking. Immediately I opened the door and saw him standing there, I could feel the pain and brokenness that emanated from his soul. I saw a sad man that had probably cried more than I could ever imagine since I took a walk out of his life. His eyes looked tired from crying and his soul seemed shattered. There was no doubt that Oscar had equally been going through a lot but that wasn’t enough reason to change my mind.

“Come in” I said after opening the door and without hesitating, he quietly walked inside. As we stood at the balcony looking at each other, I didn’t know when tears began to fall from my eyes. He immediately tried to wipe my tears away with his hands but I stopped him from touching me. “Please don’t touch me, why did you do this to us? Oscar why?” I soberly asked, “Sophie please I’m sorry, forgive me I beg you. I can’t live without you; I honestly can’t. My life has been hell since you left. Every happiness in me has been drained because of your absence. Sophie please forgive me, I honestly don’t know why I did what I did. What happened between Dora and I was a huge mistake and I take the blame for everything. I was vulnerable at the time and didn’t stop for once to think about how my actions would affect us. Baby please don’t give up on me and what we once shared. I am entirely lost without you” he soberly said as tears fell uncontrollably from his eyes.

As I watched Oscar cry like a baby, my heart broke the more. I joined him and cried helplessly to ease some emotions off. There was no single doubt that we were both still head-over-heels in love with each other but that wasn’t enough reason for me to stay with a man that had caused me so much pain and also wasn’t enough reason to condone or encourage a bad behavior such as ‘cheating’. We were done and there was no going back on my decision.

When the tension in the atmosphere had died down a bit, I managed to speak up for the last time. “I love you Oscar and would never forget how happy you made me feel while we were together. I forgive you for everything you put me through but can’t let you back into my life. I thank you for everything you have done for me and for the many ways you made me a happy woman. It hurts that we have to say ‘goodbye’ this way but I believe we weren’t meant to be together Forever. I wish you everything beautiful life has to offer and my earnest prayer is that you live your life to your full potential because I know you are an amazing man. Take care Oscar” I sadly said.

Without being told, I believe Oscar had gotten the memo that my mind was completely made up about us. Due to that, he saw no reason to continue begging when he knew it won’t change anything. Before he left my apartment that day, he gently held my hands and looked into my teary eyes. “Sophie, before I take my leave, I just want you to know that nobody has ever loved as much as I love you. Thank you for giving me an opportunity to experience true Love in its purest form. I still won’t give up on us till hopefully you change your mind and give me another chance to make things right. I pray you find it in your heart someday to want me back but till then, I would be one call away from you. I love you baby, always had and always will. Take care of yourself, Goodbye” he said and sadly walked away.

When Oscar shut the door, it seemed as though my heart was crushed to tiny pieces. How could I love someone so much yet let them go? It made no sense emotionally why I was punishing myself by breaking up with the one man I couldn’t do without but it made sense logically why he had to be gone. I began to shed tears all over again as I watched the love of my life from the balcony get inside his car and drove away. I was broken!

Days, weeks and months passed but nothing had changed except for the fact that I wasn’t having any grudge in my heart for anyone. My heart still yearned for Oscar but I knew I had to try and move on. I still sent him a birthday gift and he sent a ‘thank you’ text message. On my birthday, he sent me so many gifts but I gave them all away to my colleagues at work. The last thing I needed was to reel myself back into another episode of thoughts and pain by keeping items that could remind me of Oscar. I needed to be far away from anything that reminded me of him just so I don’t lose my mind all over again.

Did I still love Oscar and Dora? Yes I did with all my heart but that didn’t change the fact that they both hurt me and certainly didn’t deserve me in their lives again. I guess I love really hard and that’s my greatest weakness but also my most beautiful trait. I just need to love the right people that deserve such loyalty from me.

No one knows what the future holds, neither did I. Oscar might make an entrance back into my life or not but one thing I would never do is sit and dwell on such possiblity. I needed to move on with my life and that’s exactly what I did.

Love is beautiful and not painful, ugly or bitter. I might not know everything that my future holds but one thing I know for sure is that I would never settle for less love than I deserve. You shouldn’t too!


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