IF ONLY I HAD WAITED
©️Ojo Rhoda Ayanfeoluwa.
I knew I had no problem in childbearing, but I couldn’t fathom where the problem was.
The tension was too much for me to bear. I didn’t want to leave my husband. I just didn’t want to let go of him because I could vividly remember how we started. I could vividly remember the love that was once between us. I just couldn’t allow him to slip out of my hands.
He wasn’t interested in my existence. He didn’t care if I was still alive.
I thought of what to do when it was as if the 60 days he gave me to get him a baby was fast approaching, day-by- day, then I remembered an old – time friend of mine.
Without giving it much thought, I located him and paid him a visit.
Unfortunately, his wife wasn’t around. I explained my predicament to him. He really felt for me.
I never knew he had interest in me before that time. On that day, he professed his love for me. He wish I was the lady he had married. His marriage to his wife was hell to him. He wish I had accepted his proposal that day he proposed to me. Of a truth, he made his intentions known to me when I was in my first year in the University, but I turned him down. He was a member of a cult group in school and I didn’t want to have anything to do with a cultist.
I blessed God he wasn’t after my life. He later settled for another woman which he later happened to marry.
After my first visitation to his house, little-by- little, I fell in love with him. I began to visit him frequently whenever his wife wasn’t around. Along the line, I took in. I told him I was pregnant for him, he was happy. I was happy my womb could carry a child.
To be sincere with you, my joy knew no bound. He promised not to be in full custody of the child. We kept everything that ever happened between us a secret.
On the 40th day, I made it known to my husband that I was a week gone. He wasn’t really happy for me.
The other woman my husband later married took in. She was pregnant for my husband according to what she said. So, we became two wives in the house.
Life wasn’t easy for me. The other woman made life unbearable for me. When I thought being pregnant would make him love me exceedingly, I was very wrong. He didn’t love me like he used to do before.
Everything I did in his sight was imperfect. His mother saw me as a piece of trash.
I couldn’t bear how I was being treated.
When my daughter was born, my husband never catered for her. I tried all I could to make life comfortable for her.
Along the line, my old time friend showed up. He told me he wanted to see my daughter one day. After much threat, I took her to him. He was happy he had a child because an accident occurred that claimed the lives of his three children in a day which rendered him childless.
The battle line was drawn when I threatened never to release her to him again.
When I was too stubborn, my old time friend involved one herbalist. The own thing boomeranged.
My daughter had an accident. It was an unusual one. How everything happened was a mystery to me.
She was in need of blood because she lost a lot of blood. My husband was called upon to donate his blood for her. Along the line, the doctor made us to understand that his blood wasn’t compatible with my daughter’s own.
I would have donated my blood but I wasn’t in good condition to donate blood.
The blood in the bank wasn’t enough for her. I called my old time friend to tell him about the latest development. He didn’t pick my calls initially but he later did.
Before he could get to the hospital, my daughter gave up the ghost.
I never knew the herbalist claimed my daughter’s life because of a pending sacrifice my old time friend failed to offer.
I cried my eyes out. I couldn’t believe it.
I became a woman without a child.
All the secrets I kept away from my husband were exposed. He couldn’t believe his eyes that I could go to that length to get a child at all cost.
Along the line, I was sent out of the house. My mother in law mocked me. It was as if I should commit suicide.
I knew the problem wasn’t from me. If I could give birth to a child without any issue then, he should be the one with problem.
I finally found Christ fully. I gave my life to Him and was devoted to the things of God. If I couldn’t have a child to cater for then I have no other choice than to delight in God.
God made me to understand that my husband would still come back for me. He made me to understand that He has a great plan for me although I disrupted His plans by cutting corners. He made me to understand that He has given me second chance to make things right.
I forgot totally about my husband. I lived as if I had no man in my life. My work was my husband. Although, it wasn’t easy living a lonely live but I felt it was a cross I must bear.
After the 7th year I left my husband’s house, I received a message from a strange number. The person pleaded for my forgiveness and told me he would be visiting me at my place of work the following day.
I thought it was someone I knew but had forgotten, that was coming to pay me a visit.
Lo and behold, it was my husband.
“Bidemi, what are you doing in my office?” I asked.
I sounded too harsh but deep within me, I wasn’t angry at all.
“Please, I want to tell you something. I have a lot to tell you. I have a lot I would like to explain to you.” He said.
“Please, go straight to the point. I don’t have time. You can see I’m very busy at the moment.” I said.
He pleaded with me to give him a listening ear.
His confession broke me down.
What did he say?
To be continued.
©️Ojo Rhoda Ayanfeoluwa.
Ojo Rhoda Ayanfeoluwa