🥺HOW I BECAME A GOAT (A true life story)
EPISODE 2
That morning I was murmuring my morning murmur,yes I call it morning murmur because it was like a morning ritual…the way I brush in the morning was how I murmur, sometimes sef my father will remind me in the morning and say “Tony you have not murmured your morning murmuring o” i will then reply “oh it is true o,I almost forgot ,I am coming o”thank you for reminding me…
I will then come outside in anger like a wounded lion and start ranting and murmuring.
As I was causing and regretting the reason for my existence my friend Abiola came in, my friend came from a Yoruba family..a very respectful and rich family,I sometimes eat good food in his house; better food like Salad,fried eggs,noodles etc…those were what I called good food meeennn, not those every day yam and beans.
The day I ate fried rice in his house I became mad at my father when he asked me to go and prepare jollof rice with fish,ordinary dead ice fish o when my mates were eating chicken,turkey and better goat meat.
So back to that Saturday morning, as my friend entered I became so furious because he was smiling while entering my compound. He greeted my father good morning and came straight to where I was standing like a tree. “O boy keep your face well abeg, stop keeping face like shit” he said to me still smiling
I swear if not for one thing I for comot your teeth this morning, what is good about this morning? Why do you always come here happy? After drinking tea and bread in your house,you will bring out 32 and come here smiling, Idiot…he laughed his lungs out because that was my usual thing whenever he comes in the morning,I think I can now proudly say my pains hates day time…if not how can you explain the morning angers? Well that is by the way…
Abiola dragged me to the corner and told me there was good news,he said I would be so happy to hear it; I managed to smile small but I made sure my teeth did not show because this my mumu friend is fond of giving me false hope and bringing nonsense ideas on how to solve my problems.
He told me there was a job vacancy he saw somewhere close to the major road of my town, that the pay was good and this might be my poverty elevation crown of victory, I was like,are you sure? He said yes…I then asked him the type of job? He suggested we go there together that he cannot tell me himself because he doesn’t know yet.
I was skeptical at first but I didn’t have a choice,what can man do na…so I followed him without even informing my father of my whereabouts and I wish I did
I followed Abiola to the place he was talking about and sincerely I was having cold fit but man gat to be man meeenn…
As we arrived the office,someone welcomed us and gave us a sit. We sat down while watching the football match showing on the big plasma tv in the reception room.
Abiola then told me that,if everything goes well that I must settle him,I looked at him in anger…yes,it was still morning so my morning anger has not subsided yet,at least not until night…you see your life?I asked him,my life?
What happened to my life? Omo stop that play o,you will settle me.
I don’t even know the nature of the job or if I am going to be employed and you’re already taxing me,upon all the money your family has…sometimes I wonder why I am still friends with you,are you normal sef? I asked Abiola who was already killing himself with laughter,I guess he’s already used to my Aja onu (bad mouth) we relaxed and enjoyed our Match,as we waited for someone to attend to us.
After some time,a man came out from one of the offices..he walked straight to us and asked who amongs us needed the job,I raised my hands up happily and stood up immediately like a soldier ready for war, yes it was indeed war😭
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TBC
By Chika Christina
