MY FACEBOOK GIRL SEASON 5
EPISODE 7
I left home on Monday morning and drove my car to work as usual, the thoughts of all that transpired between me and Funmilayo over the weekend was seriously disturbing my brain as I was driving to work.
“How do I look into Funmi’s face today?”
” What if she ask me questions?”
“What if she asks me how her cloths disappeared from her?”
” What if she ask me how she woke up without pants on?”
” How do I give answers?”
” What if she accuse me of raping her?”
” Onihaxy!!! Just be bold and be a man”
I parked my car and walked into the office to pray, I asked my office mates if they had seen Funmilayo that day and I was told that she went to the ground floor for an executive meeting. My mind wasn’t at rest throughout the connect meeting we had in the morning. I returned from the connect session and my mind was still very much disturbed as I sat down on my seat. I was about to commence the work for day when I heard the sound of the main entrance door, I lifted up my head to see who was coming inside and behold, it was Funmilayo. I was totally shocked on seeing her, the rate of my heartbeat was tripled immediately and I didn’t know when the file on my hand dropped on the table. Funmi was walking towards the entrance of her office and she stopped by at my table with a smile on her face and she said “good morning Onihaxy. Hope your weekend was good?”, with great fear still on my mind, I replied her saying. “My weekend was good. Thanks”. She cat-walked inside her office with her shoe hills making sounds on the floor, She shut her door and I became totally confused.
” Did Funmi just smiled at me?”
” I was expecting her to frown”
” Does it mean that she wasn’t aware of all that happened?”
” Or could she be pretending?”
” Since she didn’t say anything, then I have to keep mute then”.
I continued my work until break time when I decided to chat with Segun.
ME: hi Segun.
SEGE: how far Onihaxy?,
ME: I dey oooo.
SEGE: how far with you and your boss?, what did she say?
ME: she never said anything oooo. Infact, I was so confused when I saw her smiling at me just now.
SEGE: maybe she doesn’t want to talk about it.
ME: I don’t think so. The Funmi that I know will rather frown at me instead of smiling.
SEGE: maybe she might talk about it later.
ME: I don’t think so, or couldn’t be that she was really unconscious of the s*x.
SEGE: maybe or maybe not. Don’t judge now. Wait till you guys will have a discussion together to see if she will ask you or not.
ME: alright, no problem. Let’s chat later Segun, I want to go to the canteen to eat.
SEGE: alright Onihaxy. Let’s chat later.
I stood up from my seat and picked my wallet from my bag which I placed beside my chair. I was about going out when I got an office mail from Funmilayo. I opened the message to read the content and I almost fainted when I read that Funmi said I should see her in her office immediately.
*****chai!!!!!, I’m finally in trouble***
I summoned all the courage I could gather and I went to meet her in her office. My mind wasn’t settled as I was already having the pictures of been sacked in my mind. I knocked on the door and she told me to come in, I pulled out her visitor’s chair and I sat down. I wasn’t bold enough to look into her face and I was looking at her desk.
FUNMI: Onihaxy, how was your weekend?
ME: it was fine.
FUNMI: you were telling me about being drunk on Friday night. I have been trying to recollect about it but I couldn’t remember. What really happened?.
ME: **forced smile*** eeeehm. We arrived at the bar, you ordered for two bottles of Guinness and pepper soup while I ordered for a can of energy drink. You later ordered for three more bottles.
FUNMI: really? Ehn ehn?
ME: yes. Then you started acting like someone that was high and intoxicated. That was when I begged a guy to help me bring you to the car.
FUNMI: and why can’t you bring me to the car by yourself?
ME: your weight was too much for me to lift as at that time.
FUNMI: hahahahahaha. Lazy boy
ME: ***smiled****
FUNMI: so, what happened next?
ME: I drove you home and took you to your bedroom and I left.
FUNMI: you left immediately?
ME: Not really. I think we reached your house at past 12 midnight and I left your place at around 4am in the morning.
FUNMI: how did you open the gate and the main door?
ME: I took your bunch of keys from your bag and I started trying it one after the other until I got through.
FUNMI: hmmmmm, so where were you between 12 midnight and 4am?
ME: *****chai!!!!**** I think I was in the living room trying to get some sleep.
FUNMI: are you the one that changed my clothes?
ME: ***silent for a while*** no oooo, you changed it yourself.
FUNMI: how did you know that I changed it by myself?, were you there with me?
ME: ****chaiiiii, see interview ooo**** not at all, I came back to check on you at few minutes to 4am before going home. That was when I saw you in your night gown.
FUNMI: **smiled** hmmmmmm, Onihaxy!!!!!!!!!
ME: ***scared*** what is that ma?
FUNMI: never mind. Thanks for the ride and outing anyways.
ME: you are welcome.
FUNMI: so, aren’t you going out for lunch?
ME: I will. I was about going out when I got your mail.
FUNMI: ***brought out a thousand naira from her purse*** ok, take this and get a plate of rice for me while you are coming.
ME: ok boss ****stood up****
FUNMI: ****smiled*** Onihaxy, you were so full of energy that friday night. Now I understand the reason behind your taking of energy drink.
ME: ***dumb-folded and silent*** thanks. Let me start going now. I’m so hungry.
FUNMI: alright, no problem.
I got out of Funmi’s office with my heart beating heavily and confusion written on my face. I began to reflect on my last conversations with Funmi.
“She said I was full of energy?”
” She was smiling when she said it”
“Does that mean she was conscious of what happened?”
” Does that mean she wasn’t really drunk?”
” Does it mean she deliberately acted like someone who was drunk or high?”
” Was it that she acted drunk to lured me into sexual intercourse?”
“Why was she asking me about who pull off her clothes?”
” It seems I’m a little bit safe”.
I got to the restaurant and ordered for a plate of rice for myself which I ate there, I also purchased a takeaway pack for Funmi. I decided to call Segun as I was leaving the restaurant.
ME: hello Segun.
SEGE: how far Onihaxy?
ME: I’m good. Funmi surprised me today.
SEGE: really? How?.
ME: she told me to see her in her office like an hour ago.
SEGE: hmmmmmm, what happened next?
ME: she started asking me questions.
SEGE: which questions?
ME: she told me that she couldn’t remember how she got home and she asked me. I told her that she was so drunk after taking 5 bottles of Guinness stout and I drove her to her house thereafter.
SEGE: is that all?
ME: no, she asked me the time I got to her house and the time I left, she asked me if I was the one that changed her cloths.
SEGE: yeeeepa!!!!!. So, what was your response?.
ME: I replied her that I dropped her in her bedroom when we reached her house and I slept in the living room before going home at 4:00am. She just smiled and called out my name saying “hmmmmm Onihaxy!!!!!!!”.
SEGE: hmmmmmmmm.
ME: she later gave me a thousand naira to buy a plate of rice for her from the restaurant. As I stood up and was about to go out, she looked at me with a smile and said “Onihaxy, you were so full of energy, now I know why you ordered for energy drinks”.
SEGE: *****laughed******* omo see checkmate!!!. She don get you and you have nowhere to run to.
ME: hmmm Segun, but I’m a little bit confused. Does that means that she was conscious of what happened?
SEGE: from that her checkmate statement, it’s so obvious that she was over conscious. She just decided to take the beer to add more ginger to her swagga. She is a professional badoooo.
ME: hmmmmmmmmm.
SEGE: well, you have been initiated already, just enjoy it while it last.
ME: bad guy.
SEGE: how is betty?, and how far with Adebimpe?
ME: Betty is fine ooo, she spoke yesterday and she was talking about marriage.
SEGE: marriage as how?
ME: she said she want us to get married after her program in the UK.
SEGE: she has a point now. Do you still expect her to return to her father’s house?, remember that someone else had been planning wedding for her?, so she has no time to stay idle at home, not even now that her father already gave her out to his friend’s son.
ME: hmmmmmmm.
SEGE: yes ooooo. You guys should just plan it and start living together, even if it is a registry wedding
ME: hmmmm. But I was thinking that we should find a way of reconciling me with her father. I don’t like it how I wasn’t given a chance to meet or know her father. What if he decided to send hired assassin to eliminate me because I disrupt her daughter’s pre-planned wedding?.
SEGE: you are a coward jor. Her father can’t do anything to you but you have a point sha. You should get to meet your father in-law. But do think it’s going to be a smooth thing?
ME: that was what Betty said too. She said her father is very strict and stubborn, she said her father will never agree to terminate her engagement with the guy in Abuja.
SEGE: hmmmmmm.
ME: but she said she will discuss with henry sha. I will also see henry and discuss with him.
SEGE: there is a simple solution to all these things now.
ME: what is the solution Segun?.
SEGE: just fire some shots inside her and impregnate her straightaway, Betty will then let her father know that she was pregnant for you and both doctors and pastor had issued warnings that she will die if she tries to abort the pregnancy.
ME: hmmmmmmmmm. Badt guy.
SEGE: Na so my guy. Cos if you lose that babe, na serious wahala oooo. You might not find her replacement again for life.
ME: yes sir.
SEGE: Onihaxy, I think it’s high time you tune down on every other women. Start planning your matrimony with Betty.
ME: ***laughed** I heard you oooo. Let’s chat later; I’m going back to the office.
SEGE: alright. ***hung up*****
I returned to the office and dropped Funmi’s food on her table. Luckily for me, she wasn’t on seat when I got there. I returned to my desk and continued the work for the day until around 6:30pm when we closed for the day. I quickly cleared my table and I ran out of the bank to prevent Funmi from seeing me, I just couldn’t face her for that day. I got into my car and drove home. At around 8:30pm in the night, my phone was ringing and I checked the screen, it was a call from Benita and I picked it up.
ME: hello Benita.
BENITA: hi Onihaxy, it’s been a long time.
ME: abi oooooo
BENITA: how is work going?
ME: it’s going fine dear.
BENITA: Onihaxy please, I need a favour from you.
ME: what is it?.
BENITA: I got an assessment test invitation this morning and the venue is Lagos. The test will be holding on Friday.
ME: waoooh. That’s good.
BENITA: thanks dear. Please, I don’t know if you can accommodate me for the duration of the tests.
ME: haba!!!!!, you are always welcome now.
BENITA: thanks Onihaxy. I will arrive in Lagos on Wednesday and leave probably on Sunday.
ME: no problem.
BENITA: make sure you stock your kitchen with food stuffs ooo. I don’t want to go hungry abeg.
ME: funny you.
BENITA: alright, I will call you later.
ME: ok dear
BENITA: bye ***hanged up*****
***chaii!!!!, another days of temptation***
WATCH OUT FOR EPISODE 8
