Jude’s side of the story continues
‘’I think you should try talking to Tracy this night. I bet she will give you a listening ear’’ Beauty calmly said with a smile as soon as we settled in my room. I stared at her with great uncertainty, a bit confused over her suggestion. Of course I was very worried over the look Tracy gave us moments ago and to me I felt the last thing she would do was to listen to anything I had to say but then Beauty was a lady as well and perhaps had a very good reason for making such a suggestion.
‘’do you think she will really listen to me after seeing us together?’’ I stammered softly. Beauty nodded, reached forward and held my left hand. I instantly felt a strange current pass through me.
‘’trust me, if she really is in love with you, she will be dying to speak to you this moment’’ she added, releasing her grip while I lustfully stared at her for no just reason. Yes of course I had no reason to have such silly ideas about her in my head but somehow it just popped in there. I quickly had to look away to focus on the problem at hand.
‘’I don’t want to lose Tracy. I guess I will go with your advice’’ I breathed softly.
‘’yea don’t wait for her to return to her room before making your move. I advice you wait for her at her door. Surprise her with your presence. That will be better’’ she added, smiled at me and reached for my TV remote while I hesitantly stood up to follow up with her advice.
Deep inside, my heart pounded furiously. I prayed deeply for her idea to work as I made my way towards Tracy’s room.
A minute later, I calmly stood in front of Tracy’s door like a frightened kid as I waited for her to show up. I really wasn’t sure if the idea was going to work but since I had nothing to lose in trying it out; I had to go on with the plan.
You can’t imagine the surprise on Tracy’s face the moment she showed up to see me waiting for her at the door. She just couldn’t believe her eyes. She stopped a distance away with a look of surprise shaded with resentment.
‘’what on earth are you doing there?’’ she asked with a slightly raised tone. I quickly took a nervous step towards her.
‘’I came for us to talk. You can’t shut me out of your life like that. You can’t throw away all we had built over the years as if they were nothing. I deserve a fair hearing. You can’t judge me with mere hearsay’’ I spoke with great courage, taking her back with my boldness.
‘’oh Christ, not again’’ she breathed, folding her hands.
‘’I see, your new friend put you into this. I get it. She told you what to say and how to act. Go back to your room and tell her that it didn’t move me’’ she breathed coldly.
‘’why are you so uptight?. Let’s go to your room and talk, please I beg of you. We got to settle this tonight’’ I demanded pleadingly. She hesitated for a moment before shaking her head.
‘’there is nothing to talk about. You are a liar, you are a deceiver. I can’t let you ruin my life or my future. You are having a child with another woman and that can’t be erased. You never denied it either. So don’t tell me shit about love. This Is Africa. I can’t toy with my future so blazingly. No matter what, you will still go back to her in the end and by then it will be too late for me. The decision of moving on with my life is something I took time to decide and nothing can change it. I have a new guy now and please respect my decision’’ she poured out solemnly, walked past me and unlocked her door while I speechlessly stood like a carved image, uncertain of what next to say or do. Of course she had every right to protect her happiness and future by moving on with her life but she was the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. There just wasn’t any possible way of convincing her that I was genuinely in love with her. Yes I had my flaws. I made terrible mistakes but no matter what, I still loved her.
‘’Trey I know I hurt you very much. But I will never stop loving you. I will do everything to prove myself’’ I stammered, stopping her with my words. She turned, and stared at me for a while before swallowing hard as if she wanted to say something.
Eagerly I waited for her to say something but I was disappointed. She simply shook her head after battling with herself for some seconds, turned and headed into her room.
I couldn’t force myself into her room. I knew I had to let her be for the meantime, but however I realized that moment that no matter her cold attitude towards me that she was still very much in love with me, she simply was protecting her future and happiness just like she expressed and I knew she was right about it.
All I needed was just a way to break her resistance which clearly looked impossible at that time.
To be continued.
